Everyone On ‘The L Keyword’ Cheats; Perform Lesbians Cheat Even More? | GO Mag

Lez revisit the initial
“The L Term.”
Remember when
Alice Pieszecki
virtually cheated on Tasha in period 5 with Clea, that visitor on “the appearance?” After resisting her attraction, Alice tells

“we-all just allow our very own
interactions blow-up
on first little temptation. No one works on their own relationships any longer. Every person’s completely for immediate gratification, and that I don’t want to end up like that.”

Oh, Alice, you may be very correct.

Jenny cheats on Tim with Marina.

Cherie cheats on Steve with Shane.

Bette cheats on Tina with Candace.

Dana cheats on Tonya with Alice.

Tonya cheats on Dana with Melissa.

Tina cheats on Helena with Bette.

Shane cheats on Carmen with Cherie.

Jenny cheats on maximum with Claude.

Phyllis cheats on Leonard with Alice.

Shane cheats on Paige with an agent.

Cindi cheats on Dawn with Shane.

Bette cheats on Jodi with Tina.

Niki cheats on Jenny with Greg.

Felicity cheats on the partner with Bette.

Lena cheats on Tess with Shane.

Sophie cheats on Dani with Finley.

It seems like absolutely nothing much changed for the fidelity office from the collection finale about ten years ago into show finale 30 days ago. These females lack an excellent track record. (But hey, neither perform the dudes. Viewing you Max, Angus, Benjamin Bradshaw, and Gabriel McCutcheon.)

Bear in mind whenever Jenny tried to seduce Stacy Merkin’s girlfriend and the sweetheart “only” can make on together shirtless alone within accommodation in place of making love? She’s deemed a “saint.” What about when Sophie cheats on Dani with Finley

right before their expected wedding?

Requirements, girls. Wow.

Everybody else defines cheating differently. Some would forgive Tina’s online-only tryst with DaddyOf2; others wouldn’t normally. (however, on “The L keyword,” the minute messaging is known as “f*cking him” by Bette, since there are a lot more F bombs on this subject tv series compared to a bunker.) Tasha states “thinking is actually cheating,” and, sadly, by her own description, she becomes a cheater too (Jaime). Some instances are totally clear-cut; no body would report that Lena’s hook-up with Shane was not cheating.

When this tv series were your own only representation of queer ladies, you would assume we can not ensure that it stays within our jeans. Very, in real life, are we able to?

In British matchmaking firm java & organizations


of 3,000 people in Britain, 25 % of females — when compared with 9 percent of males — stated they’d seriously hack should they decrease for someone outside their own connection. However, another type of U.S.


during the “Archives of intimate Behavior” revealed 23 per cent of straight males had duped within their existing union, versus 19 per cent of direct women, so it’s confusing if men or women cheat more to start off with. In any event, it looks like there is enough it occurring!

A U.S. study

printed in

Group Process

in 2011 revealed lesbians to really have the


cheating rates of anybody: 8 percent for lesbians, ten percent for directly men, 14 percent for directly women, and 59 percent for gay guys. I have found this pretty amazing, particularly because of the reputation right men have actually.

If lesbians undoubtedly possess lowest infidelity price, subsequently “The L Word” is stirring-up drama. I became curious about just what genuine queer females had to state about that, so I posted in a

Twitter party

centered on “The L keyword: Generation Q.” In the beginning, dozens happened to be wanting to jump in with commentary how unfaithful “The L term” women can be, increasing the list at the top of this information. But once I then followed up asking


this is, only one person had been willing to speak about whether or not the tv show reflects the way we have been in actual life. Marlena, a 52-50 year old lesbians from Maryland, said she does not believe lesbians cheat any more than anyone else, but the notion is probably a stereotype. Regarding the program, Marlena states, “In my opinion that ‘The L term’ does their work of interesting people, while revealing the flaws in humankind we all have actually. I really don’t believe ‘The L Word’ accounts for bad photos more than ‘Breaking negative’ is for advertising an image of a teacher selling drugs.”

Just how does cheating in fact affect a relationship?

A 2016 evaluation

more than 63,000 men and women published during the “Archives of intimate Behavior” considered who be more annoyed over intimate unfaithfulness when compared with emotional cheating (dropping in love with someone else but not actually acting on it). Lesbians and bisexual females reported they would end up being just as troubled over either sort. (For what it is well worth, direct men cared about bodily and direct women the exact opposite.) I’ve never ever myself already been duped on (that i understand of) or cheated (by my description),


Used to do fall for my personal now-wife within the last few days associated with connection I happened to be in. I dumped that woman before I acted on such a thing using my now-wife, but that ex-girlfriend was actually not surprisingly angry. Personally I think like i did so best thing by perhaps not functioning on it while in another connection — it’s not possible to really assist your feelings — but i could confess, if my partner fell in love with another person and kept myself, it mightn’t be a lot comfort to learn that they had gender a single day after we divorced instead of the day before.

In a number of interactions, getting attracted to someone while staying in a relationship with another actually an issue. Polyamorous people acknowledge these particular attractions tend to be normal and also have open connections. Why don’t we end up being obvious: Polyamory is

maybe not

infidelity. Cheating is certian outside your own agreements along with your partner(s), of course the arrangement states sleeping along with other men and women is okay, then it’s great. (My personal relationship had been described as monogamous, therefore connecting with my now-wife whilst with my then-girlfriend


are cheating.) While i’m really monogamous inside my direction, I think polyamorous men and women have a great solution to reduce the instance of cheating in connections by being initial about how do not stop having destinations simply because we are partnered. Giving both authorization to do something to them in demonstrably described limits is a sure way some one predisposed to cheating could preempt any harm potentially due to setting up with somebody else.

Just take Alice Pieszecki including again. I was thinking for sure she or Nat was going to deceive with Gigi, but instead of blowing in the connection over an attraction, they managed to get operate. That threesome in the back of Dana’s was the latest scene of ”

Generation Q!”

Poly connections require a lot of interaction, as well as the throuple wouldn’t set down the things they had been confident with, causing the blow-up when Nat and Gigi had intercourse with each other without Alice. It doesn’t have to go straight down like this (pun meant).

Most lesbians are about as forgiving as Alice:

One 2015 appearance

at lesbian connections revealed that whenever there clearly was cheating, 80 percent of couples split. So often,

the connection currently features problems whenever the infidelity happens

, so they really might have been going towards break-up anyhow. I was absolutely prepared breakup with that ex long before I fell so in love with my wife, and that other person had been exactly the motivation to ultimately leave.

It generally does not appear that cheating is obviously more predominant in interactions between two ladies IRL, exactly what can we carry out about it with regards to really does arise? Splitting up is but one option — like exactly how Tess remaining Lena — or concentrating on it — like greater and Tina reconciling following Candace event — is an additional. There is the preventative way of measuring checking the connection like Alice attempted. None of them is “right,” since every situation and connection is exclusive, but nobody should let it rest unacknowledged.

Just like Alice must carry out in period among the initial “The L keyword” by shedding Gabby Deveaux, making a cheater is generally an affirmation of self-worth. Marlena in Maryland agrees. “If you provide your own intimate energy to someone else, you ought to get be using them. Release myself therefore I can create the exact same.”